Wednesday Ramble

The urge to quit the internetz and start a 'zine is very tempting for me. I would love nothing more than to go to Staples, buy a pack of 100% recycled legal-sized paper, an industrial stapler and start wrecking the world with my kick ass mag. Back in the day, I had a K1nko's hookup. Actually I had two unrelated kids in two unrelated cities that turned a blind eye to my tomfoolery. Not only would my friends encourage me to steal photocopies they would actually inspire a rebellious assault against their corporate overlords. Everything from boatloads of color copies to mugging for the passport photo camera to packs of every color of highlighters imaginable. If you must know, I had 'zine with my friend filled with emo poetry and interviews with musicians. My love for horror was pretty much totally dormant during this time period so it never occurred to me to start some shit like that.

So I guess if all else fails with NEHF, I think I'll just put out a really bitchin' 'zine. Color cover, 30-40 pages per issue, bonus horror soundtrack mixes on CD-R, etc. Price would be $5 (shipping included). I could get writerly folks to contribute articles. And do you know why I would do all this? Because screw the internet, that's why! Oh man, I'm getting really psyched about this. Of course, I'll probably never do this. Sigh.

I'm just friggin' smacking myself for not putting out a righteous horror fanzine back in the 90s when horror movies were at their worst. There is always going to be stupid shit but finding a good 90s horror movie was a bit of a challenge. Obscurity was the only way to find anything worthwhile. If I had been into the genre back then I would have taken advantage of the weirdo video store run by that hippie dude in Port St. Lucie, Florida. Can't remember the name of that place for the life of me. Anyway, the slickness of film producers back in the 90s eradicated most of the cracks, warts and wrinkles that made 70s and 80s horror flicks so special. If ever there was a time to obsess over horror filmdom's past, it would have been in the dang 90s.

Nothing pleases me more than rummaging through the boxes of back issues at Green Shift and stumbling across some old horror fanzine. For some reason, horror seemed more special in the 80s. As the industry grew and exploded in that lovely decade, the back pages of old 'zines and even Fangoria had ads for VHS tapes of old clunky horror flicks. I'm fascinated by pre-internet, pre-DVD horror movie culture. I'm glad that films are all restored and cleaned up nowadays but there's just something special about crappy old full frame tapes. Sometimes a shitty horror movie will benefit from a dingy and yellowed transfer.

Wow, okay where was I going with all this? Before I go, I have to point out this sweet Flickr set of old VHS cover art.