The worst thing about writing fiction is that once one character poops then you start thinking 'Well, I guess now everyone has to poop'. So you go back and start adding in every single time that every single one of your characters uses the toilet. It's great for the word count but think what it does to your soul, duder! Okay, so I'm only at 17,000+ words. I kind of had a migraine for about 4 days and could barely look at a computer. But, the pain is gone and I'm back in the game. Will I get to the 50k? No. Will I be glad that I made the dream of finishing this dang book a little bit more real? Yes. Should I just shut the hell up? Yes, YES, YESSS!
From Giorgio Ferroni, the guy who directed Night of the Devils, comes Mill of the Stone Women. This is a pretty great Italian/French co-production with a very morbid and bleak atmosphere. There is some padding by way of a couple of redundant scenes and cornball "we-must-explain-crap-we-don't-need-to-explain" dialogue but otherwise a great film. Cinematography by Pier Ludovico Pavoni is bright, colorful and razor sharp. Performances by leads Pierre Brice and Scilla Gabel are fantastic. Mill of the Stone Women would make a great double feature with any of Barbara Steele's Italian gothics of the time.
I think we have a porblem! It is November 16th and I only have 8,000 words. So I have 14 days to come up with 42,000 words. That is seriously screwed up, yo. I'm going to be running silent for the next two weeks on the blog here. Crap, I haven't even got to the part of the story where everything goes freakin' bonkers and people's faces start getting ripped off. Okay, I did have a part where someone's lips got chewed off but that was like boring compared to what happens later. Anyway, here are some clues to what inspired this whole book I'm doing:
For years, I've been under the delusion that I had already seen Beyond the Valley of the Dolls. Truth is until last night, I'd seen most of Valley of the Dolls (which I need to revisit soon) and about two minutes of Beyond and my mind had melded them together with a false memory of seeing the film. For reasons I only now understand, I recorded the flick on the DVR when IFC played it a few days ago and just started watching it after dinner last night. Well, it only took me about two seconds before I realized: "HOLY SHIT! I have never seen THIS before!"
If you haven't seen this movie yet and you have even a passing interest in trashy nonsense, then do yourself a favor and experience Beyond the Valley of the Dolls. The editing is like a lightning-powered blender stuck on purée. Many instances of dialogue are trimmed so tight that they almost don't make any sense. The script and the plot are so contrived, convoluted and campy that my brain exploded. There's sleaze to spare and a surprising amount of violence wrapped in a comically dated late 60s package that is still offensive after all these years. I consider this a life-changing experience that I cannot recommend highly enough.
Well, I'm somewhere around the 5,000 word mark so let's go ahead and quote Rocky and Bullwinkle:
Rocky: I don't think we're gonna win this one, Bullwinkle. Bullwinkle: We'll be lucky if we lose!
But I will not admit defeat. I still have 19 days and I'd like to think that anything is possible. In case you're wondering, my novel is going to sick, gory, demented, and just a tad surreal. Oh, you're not wondering? Neither am I. Anyway, I got my copy of Footprints starring Florinda Bolkan the other day. Can't wait to fire up that one! Bless the sacred and holy international DVD player for that one. Okay, enough of all this stalling, I need to get back to the book.
The unpacking continues as does National Novel Writing Month but I still find time for horror movies. While my collection is still in boxes waiting for proper shelving to be purchased and assembled, I did pick up Die, Monster, Die! with badass Boris Karloff for $3 at Big Lots the other day. I assumed that this film was one of Karloff's later cheapie efforts where his ailing health made him less of an asset and more of a setpiece.
Much to my delight, this Lovecraft-inspired film is incredibly atmospheric, is well acted by everyone involved and even has some good scares. Cinematography by Paul Beeson is especially impressive. Karloff is in fine form here as the head of the dying Witley family. Dude has a thing for glowing rocks. Freda Jackson, who is obscured behind black curtains during her entire screen time, is phenomenal as his ailing wife. Her scenes are chilling. Anyway, if you see this one gathering dust at your local Big Lots, grab it!
So what the damn hell is my stinky novel about anyway? The short version goes like this: A high school girl finds out her father is a serial killer which may or may not be a bad thing. It occurred to me that no one in the history of popular culture has ever written a horror novel about a serial killer. The killing of serials remains the last great untouched resource of creative ideas for novelists. I must be the first person to try and describe what makes these murderers tick. Hoowee hoowee wow!
So yeah, I am now 849 words into my novel which is tentatively titled "Winter" or "More Winter" or "That's My Triangle Ram Don't Free The Pee". Actually, I got up to 23 grand last year but didn't even come close to what I'm trying to do with this thing. So hopefully, if I get this second part of the novel up to the 50,000 word mark, I'll have something pretty substantial on my hands.
This serial killer idea has been kicking around in my head since Thanksgiving of 2002. You see, I went on this 23 hour roadtrip with my future wife and future in-laws and started to develop the idea on the road. Why do family activities make me think about murder? Seven years later, I'm still trying to get this dang friggin' thing on paper or Word document or whatever. Anyway, wish me luck.
Halloween? More like HalloLOSE! The least Halloween-like thing you can do is moving to a new apartment. Between the old apartment, the new apartment, the Salvation Army donation drop-off, and the storage unit, there is just no room for spooky good times. I couldn't even get to the box containing Slumber Party Massacre! I know it has nothing to do with Halloween but for my wife and I, it is a must see on our favorite day of the year.
The one shining light was finally sitting down and watching Once Bitten with my wife and mother-in-law (our new roomie!). I have always had a soft spot for this flick ever since catching it on cable with my folks back in the day. This trashy and campy Jim Carrey loser has earned itself a regular spot in our Halloween lineup permanently. It gets better with every viewing, seriously.
So what else? Oh yeah, it's National Novel Writing Month once again. Last year, I was defeated by both my wife and my mother-in-law who made the 50,000 word goal. Unfortunately, I only managed to get to 23,000. This time, I hope to get to 25,000 if not actually winning the dang thing. So things are going to get pretty quiet around here. But don't worry, I will be popping up with progress reports on the book and occasional musings on movies but I really want to make my goal this year.
This Cinema Somnambulist and his Doomed Moviethon train have officially relocated. We are still in the process of moving. My mom-in-law is here and her belongings will arrive shortly. After that, this blog and the DM will resume their normal activities. With her, she brought some new pals: Pickles the bird and Shadow the dog. Now that our house is a dang zoo, I think I'll hold off on any animals-gone-mad style horror. The first horror movie we all watched together was the William Castle version of The Old Dark House. Amazing.
This is Shadow. He's ready for Giallo Meltdown 4.
The new place is pretty awesome. The patio is screened in. Oh there will be cigars smoked out there. Oh yes. There is a 7-11 in very short walking distance from the apartment complex so moviethon fuel will be easily attainable. These are the good times. Well, there's still lots to do. We have to finishing packing and cleaning up the old Doomed Moviethon Central so that we can get our dang deposit back. Plus socializing our cats, Crisco and Sparkles, with new friends is a pretty big job too. Take care, y'all.
Yesterday I posted a long monstrosity about seeing Halloween II with Nafa. Well, Nafa is gracing Cinema Somnambulist with his own take on the film. Here's what he has to say:
To me, the teaser poster was immediately iconic—it didn’t matter that it made no sense at the time. It was almost as if they used a photo that was second or third choice, not the best or full on facing shot. The poster was little more than a washed out side view of Michael Myers with his knife raised aloft and grass or corn along the bottom of the image, and the words ‘Family Is Forever’ across the top. But from the first second Richard sent it to me I knew there was something special lurking inside.
By the time Richard and I were able to see the film it was my third trip. The first time I was transfixed by how beautiful things were, familial and soft. The second time, I saw more of the gore and sheer brutality, but also became more aware of the dream. The third time was just a complete immersion and awakening. Characters became more familiar and empathy that was absent the first two times was realized.
It was at this third viewing that I realized that every character elicits some sort of individualized emotion or state. And I mean everyone—the avuncular safety represented by Buddy, the filth of Big Lou, and the caution-to-the-wind abandon of Harley, all the way up to the down-to-earth sensibility of Annie, the everyman concern of Sheriff Brackett, and the avarice of Loomis. The list goes on. Since every supporting player in the film emotes such a unique feeling this allows the three/four main characters to work as blank slates. Mother Myers is family, a phantom of promise and intangible. Young Michael is hopefulness and innocence, the novice. Laurie is a conflicted, unsettled sea of raw emotion and a lack of identity (which is only further exacerbated by later revelations). And masked Michael is the device, the non-judgmental rage— a machine.
Michael’s vengeance has never been perpetuated by any one particular thing or another. Jason Voorhees was moved by revenge for his mother and an almost holy quest to smite the sinners in action. Leatherface was a sort of ‘live to eat, eat to live’ creature. Freddy’s vengeance was aimed at the parents who killed him. But Michael, though having an impetus for his killing, has always seemed to be sort of a wind-up robot with a knife, wound and moving forward in a swath of rage, killing anything and everything in his path. He never went out of his way to kill, he was just moving from point A to point B and clearing a path along the way.
For Laurie Strode, Halloween II is a coming of age film. It’s an awakening, a step from reality to dream to reality to dream, the lines beautifully blurred and the scarred. It’s Alice In Wonderland being chased by blades into the mouth of Hell, but Hell is where she needs to be in this film.
There is lots of debate as to how much of this film is a dream, who did the actual killing, and what exactly is real. I like not having the answer. Accepting that fact is quite nearly as disturbing as the characters in the film are. This is truly one movie that brings the thoughtful viewer a tangible taste of the madness.
Two years ago, my friends and I started FAUXRROR (pronounced like Horror but with an F), a "band" that creates music for horror films that never existed. We even went so far as to give each track its own poster and plot synopsis. For FAUXRROR 2: LASERDEAD, we have created the music for just one made up film. In an alternate reality much like our own, director Ron L. Esteban set out to make his horror masterpiece but things got out of hand. This tale is told in more detail in the brief history of Laserdead included with the download.
I really wanted to see Rob Zombie's Halloween II and so I did my usual thing I do when I'm excited about a movie: I avoid as much online preview content as possible. The mostly lame trailer above is pretty much the only thing I knew about the sequel to the remake. That and Sheri Moon Zombie playing the ghost of Deborah Meyers in this one. It wasn't much to go on but something was calling to me. Something important.
I've always preferred Halloween II (the 1981 version) over John Carpenter's 1978 film. Halloween is amazing and obviously a better film but Halloween II is the one I reach for the most thanks to nostalgia. The hospital setting really got to me and after years of catching this film nearly every Halloween, it really turned into cinematic comfort food. The scene where Michael Meyers stabs that nurse and lifts her off the floor while a doped up Laurie watches in confused horror is some kind of devil-magic that still makes me smile. As to why I thought that this kind of beauty would somehow happen in the 2009 version; don't ask me. I was just hoping against hope.
My friend Nafa and I had been talking about going to see Halloween II since it came out back in August but we've both been pretty busy lately. He managed to go and see it and reported back to me that it was awesome. Nearly two months had gone by and I figured that H2 (yikes) was just going to have to be a rental. Then Nafa reminded me that it would probably still be around in theaters through Halloween to pick up some more business. Duh, I didn't think of that.
Finally, last night was our night. We got off work and headed to the University Mall. I've been going to this mall since I first set foot in Tampa 10 years ago and it has been threatening to close ever since. Yet somehow the place keeps on truckin' by managing a few mediocre renovations and adding more dang shoe stores. I would hardly call the Regal University 16 theater attached to the foodcourt my old stomping ground. I haven't been to any screenings of any film there since they opened the Muvico out in New Tampa (we have a new one!). The place was always too trashy and too noisy for me to enjoy the movies there. Of course, any theater can be great if you avoid the crowds by choosing your showtimes wisely and not going to any opening weekend regardless of how excited you are to see a flick. I'm a friggin' expert on that shit now.
With over an hour to kill before the film started, Nafa and I headed to the Halloween store that used to be a Steve & Barry's. This was a slightly half-assed affair but there were some highlights and lowlights nestled in retail hell. I keep hoping that Halloween will become the next big gift-giving holiday but that's a manifesto for a different day. Anyway, here's the goodness:
Blurry because I was trembling.
Beer: the destroyer of man.
My morale is low.
Undead princess, lead me to the truth.
I was getting hungry but nothing in foodcourt inspired me. Nafa reminded me there was a Dairy Queen/Orange Julius near the middle of the mall. It had been many, many years since I had enjoyed OJ. When I was a kid, I used to frequent the Palm Beach Mall where I would get two bacon and cheddar hotdogs and a large Orange Julius. Then after checking out the death metal tapes in Camelot Music, I would circle back for a soda from OJ. One exceptional time, I picked up Peaceful Death and Pretty Flowers by Dead Horse.
Later, in the car, my mom actually asked to read the lyrics while we were stuck in traffic. She was infuriated by the violent and dark content of the lyrics and nearly confiscated the cassette from me. Thankfully, that was the last time she did that. Had my mom read lyrics from bands like Autopsy (disgusting) or Nocturnus (satanic) or Demolition Hammer (violent) or a hundred other bands I was into at the time, my metal days would have been over.
My appetite ain't what it used to be (thank God) so I just got one bacon cheddar dog and a small Orange Julius. The cost of this meal was over $6 but no matter, it was delightful. Poor Nafa sat there watching me moan and eat like a total pig. I probably ruined his appetite. Sorry, duder. With still more time to kill, we ventured to Hot Topic, Spencer's Gifts, and a very bizarre dollar store called Kim's Dollar & More. Here's the surprise: we found cheapness everywhere!
We finally went to the Regal University 16 for showtime and it was not nostalgic at all. I doubt the place has changed much over the years but nothing looked familiar. We got our tickets and Nafa got some crazy coupons. Apparently, he's a frequet Regal customer. We walk down the hall to our theater and HEY WHAT'S THAT GUY DOING?!! There was only one other dude sitting there waiting for the film to start and I swear he had to quickly adjust his pants when he heard us walking in. This was not a good sign. While having him behind us was a risk, I made sure to have at least 4 rows between us and the probably-masturbating guy. This piece of shit would be snoring soon (hmm, why's he so sleepy all of a sudden?) but he would be easy to ignore during Rob Zombie's flick.
Okay, so now that we're reaquainted with the original Halloween II and you've made it this far in my spooOOooky journey through time and space, let's FINALLY see what Rob Zombie has done with the material. There are going to be some MAJOR SPOILERS in my little rant here so don't spill juice on your Milky Way or anything. (I just made that up.) See the movie before you read on.
H2 (I despise and love calling it that) starts us off with a great hospital sequence where Laurie (played by Scout Taylor-Compton) and Annie Brackett (Danielle Harris), who is still in a coma from the first film, are menaced by Michael Meyers (Tyler Mane). But this all turns out to be a dream (get used to it). It is a year later and Laurie is all maladjusted and shit and is now living with Annie (who is scarred up but not in a coma) and Sheriff Brackett (Brad Dourif). She is plagued with nightmares, takes lots of pills, and dresses in torn and grungy clothes (awesome). Michael's body was lost and there is speculation that he is still alive. Of course, he IS alive and is slowly making his way back to Haddonfield (killing anyone who gets in his way).
A cynical and comically prickish Dr. Loomis (Malcolm McDowell) is making the lecture circuit with his newly released book about Meyers. His book reveals that Laurie is actually Michael Meyers' sister. Laurie reads this, spazzes out, and heads over to her friends' place. There she gets drunk, dresses up like Magenta from Rocky Horror (genius), and heads out to a wild Halloween party where she binge drinks and spazzes out again. Meyers kills one of her friends at the party AND books it back home to attack Annie (finishing the job this time). A big showdown ensues between Michael, Dr. Loomis, Laurie, Sheriff Brackett, and the Haddonfield police department.
Thank you, Rob Zombie. Thank you for raping my eyes. Halloween II is so over the top and nuts that I can only describe it as taking a nauseous ride on a roller coaster made of circus peanuts as it zips through a universe of flickering fluorescent stars. The supernatural (I think) overtones and the gritty splendor are quite captivating. However, the film is also one of the most relentlessly violent and perturbing things I've ever seen in theaters. Every time I started to settle into a safe and comfortable place, the violence would come lunging back to plunge the knife in over and over again. And again!
I think Rob Zombie woke up last November 1st with a happy stomachache from too much Halloween candy and wrote down his nightmares. That is the real genesis of Halloween II. The director's obsession with the 70s, characters who inhabit the fringes of society, and constant strings of expletives were in full force. More importantly though is the film's oddness. There are a handful of dream sequences, hallucinations, or whatevers that broke up the would-be monotony of all the violent setpieces. Remember in Halloweentown II: Kalabar's Revenge when the bad dude wanted to turn everyone's Halloween masks into their own real faces? No? Well, it's like that. Sort of.
As a horror fan, I have two ways of thinking. The first is this: okay, this part of the movie is awesome. The second way of thinking: okay, everyone is going to fucking hate this part of the movie and it is still awesome. There are so many of the latter that I can do nothing but mirth-sigh (whatever that means). Now I'm not being contrary to any negative reviews this film most likely has received (haven't read any reviews just yet); I honestly feel that with every wrong turn Halloween II makes, I'm along for the ride. This film tries to do wrong by me but it can't. Better luck next time, yo. Contempt for the audience? Maybe. Contempt for the material? Probably. I heard rumors that Zombie didn't want to do this film. GOOD! He should only do projects he doesn't want to do from now. The proof is in the puddin'.
Forget the modern setting, Halloween II is a journey through a 1978 that never existed or perhaps one that is yet to come. Jason Vorhees gets resurrected by a bolt of lighting and Michael Meyers gets brought back by a cow. That is impressive. I'm having a tough time communicating how important this film is. Purists concerned with deviations from the established rules of the Michael Meyers saga (yes, he takes the mask off in this one) can nitpick if they want to but I am no purist. All I care about is mood (most important), gore (quite important), and boobs (least important) but Halloween II is more than that.
Is this flick a thinker? Yeah. And why not? There is some heavy (not like literature of anything but heavy) shit happening here. Were the dream sequences there just to screw us up or is the whole thing a dream? Did Zombie go all Eyes Wide Shut on our asses? Could be. The film is very dreamlike and there are too many oddities for it to be just accidentally sloppy writing. Beauty is the key here and there are so many gorgeous shots burned into the back of my eyes. Plot and script were put in danger for aesthetics and that is all I ever ask horror movie directors to do. I don't give a double God damn about the mechanics. Just give me smoke machines and freaky lighting.
Rob Zombie's Halloween and Halloween II are just what I needed. They heal the damage done to me by House of 1,000 Corpses (1/3 awesome, 2/3 suck) and The Devil's Rejects (that heroic death scene at the ending just ruined the whole thing for me). Both films had the atmosphere but failed miserably in other ways. This is Rob Zombie really coming into his own. Malek Akkad, I implore you, keep throwing money at Rob Zombie projects. It's working and don't let anyone tell you it ain't. "Nights in White Satin" trumps "Free Bird" every time.
After this magnificent movie ended, I had to reenter society so that I could go home. This was not an easy transition. Rob Zombie had made my world a prettier place. Colors were more vibrant and I walked a little slower to catch all the details. On the way home, Nafa and I discussed the film the entire way. This was his third time seeing Halloween II at the theater but the film's frenzied energy still had him in its clutches. He dropped me off at home where I ran up the stairs to my apartment and started babbling about the film to my wife who nodded many times and thanked me for not taking her to see it.
